


Touch, Ankh's Truth and a Taste of Salt

by QSF



Series: Dreams, escape and afterwards [3]
Category: Kamen Rider OOO
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-08
Updated: 2014-02-09
Packaged: 2018-01-11 15:01:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1174469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QSF/pseuds/QSF
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eiji keeps travelling. Ankh is not too fond of it, but at least there are perks. Part three of my 'Dreams, Escape and Afterwards' series. Spoilers for the end of the show.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Touch

The fabric isn’t right. The sun is too sharp. The air is too humid. Everything smells of green and mud and Ankh loves it. Every single little discomfort.

Not that he shows it. That wouldn’t do. Eiji’s got a smile wide enough for both of them when he apologizes to the woman and pays with what little money he has left. Stupid. They could just have taken the clothes and walked away. Nobody here could have stopped them. Nobody here even knew them, but for some reason paying matters to Eiji so he’d indulges it like he does so many of the man’s strange habits. Not that he really needed the clothes either, especially since they were clothes that weren’t perfectly right. Not what he wanted. But Eiji wanted him to have them, and there’s so few things that he wants that Ankh figures he can put up with it.

 

"Ankh, wait up!" Eiji catches up with a breath stuck in his throat, or maybe there is something else wrong with him, because he pauses and flushes when Ankh actually stops and turns around.

Not that he needed to do that. He could just have kept walking. Could have trusted Eiji to keep up like he always did, infuriatingly persistent in the face of everything. But he had chosen to stop, because it was a choice, and choices were important. He had chosen to stop, and then turn and huff and hide the smile as Eiji’s blush grew deeper because he had to amuse himself somehow.

"We don’t really need to become wanted criminals for a pair of pants and a shirt, these people have to make a living too." They had fallen in step again, side by side, though Eiji had to lengthen his stride to keep up.

"We’re already wanted thanks to you." Ankh tosses out the words carelessly, because he knows they will get Eiji to shut up long enough to drop the subject. They had left the first village they had arrived in at first light, hitching a ride on a truck heading for the local market. Eiji had kept looking over his shoulder all the way, but had refused to talk about who it was that were chasing him.

"I suppose…" Eiji trailed off like he always did, getting that cautious tenseness around his shoulders that set Ankh’s teeth on edge.

Too much about the man was raw and Ankh couldn’t trust himself to know the wounds. Not yet. Things were still too bright. Too strange. He had a body again but it was not something he was used to. Possessing the detective had given him a new insight into how humans worked, and together with his own desire for life it had been enough to re-map his new body into a passable simulacrum. He could see things clearly still. The colors of the clothes that he had taken and Eiji had paid for. Red. White. Unfamiliar patterns but the colors ran true. The fabrics did not. Too loose. Too soft. No armor.

"So, want to change?" The shift of subject came like Ankh had expected it too.

"You won’t shut up until I do." It wasn’t a question, and Ankh wasn’t sure why it was so important to the man. He had mumbled something about the fact that Ankh technically was walking around naked, but had failed to make his case clearly because the thought obviously distracted him. It distracted Ankh too, if nothing else because of the memories of what had happened last night.

"That alley maybe?" Eiji pointed into one of the many winding streets that surrounded them, leading Ankh into the shadows of the rickety buildings. "I’ll keep watch."

"I’m sure." At least the face works like it used to, Ankh can feel the smirk, and see Eiji’s reaction to it before the man quickly turns around. So many things that he has kept.

So many things that he has lost. Ankh allows his concentration to waver for a moment as Eiji’s back is turned. He can smell the alley. He can smell the manure. A bit of piss. The shadows are cool. The clothes in his hands are not right but they will do. Maybe Eiji had a point. It is an effort to form clothes, an affront to what he has learned about the human form. Armor inherent in the form is a Greed trait, an expression of power. Power he does not have. Too few core medals and nowhere to find more. He shouldn’t even have a body, but he wanted one, and here he is. Not whole. Never whole. But he can feel the chill on his skin when he drops the facade of fabric. The way his feet settle against the ground. The way his balls tighten slightly. His body reacts differently than the detective’s; he had noticed that last night. Everything is not the way it was, but it will have to do.

Like the pants. Soft. Silky. Something Eiji might have worn. Shorter than he would like. His feet feel odd in the sandals. No points. No claws. The long shirt sits on his back like wings, and maybe this is not as bad as he had imagined. Maybe he doesn’t need armor right now. Maybe he can allow himself to feel the lightness on his skin. Aware. Too aware. Eiji is staring at his back and soon he will reach out to touch, so Ankh turns around and steps forward instead. Causes the man to step back. Look a little taken off guard by the fierceness of the move.

"You look good." Eiji stumbles over the words, and Ankh can see the way his face shifts. The way he can’t keep his gaze. The way his eyes slide down to Ankh’s lips. Lip’s he can’t help but curl in a smile.

"I look better without." The reaction comes, just like he had planned. Eiji’s gaze flickers downwards, and Ankh steps close enough to almost kiss. Not quite. Stealing a breath and a brush of lips.

"We… should…" Eiji swallows but he holds his ground, leans in to kiss back.

Passion. Desire. The desire that had brought Ankh back as surely as any ritual. That would have made Ankh smile into the kiss had he not been busy devouring the other man’s lips. The desire that makes his own body reacts so much stronger than the detective’s. Harden. Skin on skin through thin, red cotton. There were so many variants of touch that he hadn’t explored yet. It had mostly been violence that had been the cause for physical contact with Eiji in the past. A supporting shoulder through the pain. Fists and anger. The heavy limpness of unconsciousness. A restraining hand. Not this. Not the soft brush of fingertips over his arm. Not the quiet heat of their chests pressed together. So many flavors of touch. So many memories of how it had felt last night.

"I want you." The words are out, plain in the way Ankh growls them, and in the way that his hands wander up Eiji’s back, searching for the spine under the soft shirt so he could trace it with his claws.

"Well…" Eiji tries to talk through the shiver, determination surfacing once more. "I want you too. Really. But there’s a bus out of here in half an hour. We’ll miss it…"

"No, we won’t."


	2. Ankh's Truth

They did not miss the buss, but only because they ran the last bit, out of breath with faces flushed from other reasons than exertion. Ankh spends the journey staring out the window with Eiji crowded up against him, chatting away with some children. Now and then he would nudge Ankh a little and translate some new tidbit he had learned. Ankh simply huffed and shrugged, not really bothering to listen. Words weren’t important. The feeling of Eiji next to him was. Anchor. Heat. The smell on him still on the hand he leaned his chin against as he watched the scenery pass by. There had been a moment there when he had felt…

No. Not lost.  
Not again.  
Whole.  
He was whole.

He kept telling himself that as the bus bounced along the bad road. He kept telling himself that as the traffic grew heavier, then thinner, and then…

"Eiji!" Roadblock. Trucks waiting with the engines running. Men with guns in cover.

The first shots fired are warning shots but people scream in panic all the same and Ankh catches a glimpse of the visceral fear that he had never quite understood lurking under the surface of Eiji. The widening of the dark eyes. A momentary breath sucked in and held, frozen in panic before his jaw clenches and he starts to move.

But Ankh moves first. He is pushed up against the window already so his armored hand smashes through the glass as if it wasn’t there as he reaches for the roof. Claws dig into metal and he swings out and up, wind tearing at his clothes as he looks around to get the lay of the land. Eiji is a step behind and requires a hand up, face still set in quiet determination.

"They won’t hesitate to shoot again," Eiji shouts, the frantic pleading more visible on his face than in his voice. "We need to get off the bus."

The wings hurt when Ankh brings them forth, but it is a good hurt. A single burning flash of almost touching the sky with Eiji is in his arms and then they land on the road, lands and rolls, leaving skin on pavement.

He had meant to keep them aloft. He really had.

Instead they make a scramble for the forest as the first bullets whizz past and Ankh feels that this idiocy has gone on long enough. He will not traipse around the greenery for days again, this time in sandals.

"Eiji!" He tosses the medals hard, and maybe there’s something in the tone of his voice that changes things, because Eiji grabs them in the air and after a moment’s hesitation turns to face their enemy, the heat of the transformation turning bullets to slag before they hit.

Lion. Tora. Cheetah.

Light. Too bright. Ankh shields his face with his arm as he tries to dispel the spots. It was the best combination he could think of on the spur of the moment even if he disliked leading with combos. Lion to blind and confuse the enemy, Cheetah with Tiger to take them out fast.

"Ankh, keep them safe!" Words left behind in the air as OOO speeds off.

Safe. Them? Oh, the bus is still speeding, the panicked driver as blinded as the soldiers. Typical. The annoyed huff comes without effort, but the wings does not. They hurt, and he hisses with pain as they carry him up and forward again, more leap than flight. It doesn’t matter though; the end result is the same.

The shift to full greed form makes him heavy enough to crash through the front window of the bus with no damage, but he can’t hold it more than a moment before he shivers back into infuriatingly soft and sensitive flesh. People scream and it is jarring and thrilling at the same time. The bus driver doesn’t protest as he yanks him from the seat and steps on the breaks. Possibly because he was knocked unconscious as Ankh crashed through the window. Oh well. Eiji should be happy all the same.

—-

Eiji is not happy, but he is hiding it well. For some reason he had always seemed bothered by people looking at him in fear. Even letting the OOOs armor fade does not change the fact that the children no longer want to joke with him, and Ankh feels a sting of unfamiliar pain. He does not like seeing Eiji disturbed; it brings with it too many memories.

Memories of Eiji standing alone, looking at nothing, face frighteningly blank, mouth faintly curved in displeasure. It never failed, the moment he noticed someone watching him the frown would fade, turn into a smile, eyes narrowing into amusement. Only rarely had he spotted Ankh though, and maybe that was one reason why he had become so fascinated with the human.

Two faces. Two people. One worn in public, one in private. It was an intriguing notion for a Greed who was nothing but surface. Their feelings went to the core of their being, but Eiji… was different. Even the memories of the detective whose body he had worn at the time only held a distant sadness when he tried to use them to figure out what that unsmiling face might mean. It had been infuriating then. It was still infuriating now.

"They wanted to kill you, don’t tell me you’re angry that I took their money." Ankh looks over at Eiji where he sits behind the wheel of the jeep. It had made sense. Staying on the bus had not been possible. A jeep gave them transportation, and the money Ankh had lifted from the pockets would serve them better than the few coins remaining in Eiji’s pocket. But Eiji is unhappy all the same. He supposes that he should at least be pleased that this is now a face the man is not afraid to wear in front of him.

"I’m not too happy about it," Eiji admits with a sheepish smile that fails to dispel the tenseness of his shoulders. "But thank you for saving the bus."

"Hmph." Ankh doesn’t deign that with an answer. That particular kind of arithmetic just seemed odd to him. If it was wrong to steal the money, it did not make it less wrong just because he saved some people.

"How do you feel?" The question is cautious, and Ankh does his best to ignore it until the silence becomes too annoying even for him.

"Who knows?" He shrugs a little, watching Eiji now that the man is forced to keep his eyes on the road as the traffic turns heavy and the buildings taller where they line the side of the road.

"It sounded like it hurt." The words are small, falling one by one from Eiji’s lips, filled with constrained worry. "Your wings…"

"I’m fine." Ankh shifted again, putting his foot up on the dashboard. Outside the car, the buildings roll past, slower and slower until they have come to a full stop at the side of the road. There’s nothing there, no reason for their pause, and it takes Ankh a moment to realize that Eiji is shivering behind the wheel.

No. Not shivering. Crying.

Not overtly, just shallow little breaths fighting for control. Ankh watches his shoulders shake and tense, the way he fiercely stares straight ahead, the engine idling. The traffic didn’t drown enough of the pain for Ankh to be able to ignore it until it went away. For a moment he ponders smacking Eiji on the back of the head calling him an idiot. But it doesn’t feel right somehow.

This is the hard part. Touch is easy. Desire is easy. Pain like this… it’s hard. Maybe if he had been Mezuul originally it would have come naturally, but he was not. He was Ankh, and this was something he had chosen, something he was trying to remake himself into. Something… no, someone that could understand why Eiji suddenly would fight to not burst into tears. Someone that would know enough to fix it. Because he already could not help but feel it.

"You didn’t mess me up." It is the closest thing to an educated guess Ankh can think of, and from the way Eiji leans his forehead against the steering wheel he is not altogether wrong.

"Really?" Eiji doesn’t sound like he believes Ankh, let alone himself. "I heard you. Just like back when… I heard you." He repeats the words instead of continuing, because neither of them needs to be reminded of the scene. Ankh trying to form a shape of his own again, failing miserably after a few seconds, forced to take refugee back with the detective against everybody’s will.

"You brought me back." Ankh knows he sounds angry now, and that is because he is. He wanted to ignore this, why couldn’t Eiji let him? "But I still don’t have all my core medals. I’m not as powerful as I could be."

"But you’re not about to fall apart?" Eiji has turned now, is looking at him with hope and disbelief.

"I’m not about to fall apart." Ankh reaches out and wills it to be true because it has to be. Any other option is impossible. He manifests his claw with a grimace that turns into a smirk, cupping Eiji’s chin. "You should know by now that this body is pretty solid."

The reaction tells Ankh that it had been the right thing to say. Some of the tenseness in Eiji’s shoulders fade and his eyes clears of shadows. At least for the moment, and the moment is everything that matters right now. The feel of skin warming under his hand. The slight twitch of Eiji’s facial muscles as he forces a smile that becomes a reality a moment later.

"I think…" the relief is palpable in the way Eiji reaches up to cup Ankh’s gloved hand in both of his own. "I think we’d better make really sure of that once we find somewhere to sleep."

Maybe it is supposed to be a joke. Ankh is not sure; cocking his head a little to try to judge what reaction is needed. In the end he decides not to give a crap and roll his eyes.

At least that way he makes Eiji laugh instead.


	3. A Taste of Salt

The shower is hot. Hot enough to scold Ankh’s skin and make it flush as the blood rushes to the surface. Another thing remembered. Another little sign that this body is right, if not as durable as he would alike.

Things remembered.   
Things realized.

He had gotten hungry earlier. That had never happened when he had possessed the detective. At first he had eaten because people had urged him to, then because he had learned to love the taste. But hunger? That deep, wretched feeling had only been for medals before. Not food. How much had he changed? It had felt good to eat. Not just because Eiji was smiling again, wearing his pleasant face as other people were watching. Not just because the taste had been strong and spicy, not as sweet as he would have liked, but it was there. Stayed on his tongue with a burning feeling, like the way the sun had marked his skin even when night fell.

Residual heat. Like the one from Eiji’s hands, somehow hotter than the water streaming down on them.

It was cramped in the shower, but he hadn’t argued when Eiji had made his way inside as well, or when he turned down the heat to something bearable after a pained little dance when he tried to put up with Ankh’s chosen temperature. The steam had filled the bathroom, the glass door to the shower open behind them. It wouldn’t have been room to move if it had been shut. Not room to cling tightly and Eiji did just that. Held Ankh tight and close under the spray of water, rocking him gently back and forth.

It was almost soothing. Ankh had to admit that. Too much sensory input. Water on his skin. Breathing steam. Eiji pressed against him. Mumbling little things drowned out by the water. Ankh didn’t ask him to speak up, it didn’t seem to be anything that required his input, just words. Eiji’s words. And maybe he should listen closer to those after all, so when the man holding him clears his throat he does just that.

"Are you ever afraid?" Eiji’s voice is hardly more than a mumble, black hair plastered against his scalp.

"No." Ankh is not sure whether that is helpful, so he adds. "I was. When the imposter was about. When I risked losing myself. But he is destroyed."

"Not even when… when you died?" Eiji’s lips against his face. Soft touches. Lapping at the water as if he had been a cat. Ankh suppresses the shiver because this is not Cazali.

"No." Ankh rests his forehead against Eiji’s, wondering what the man was aiming for. "Ceasing to be would have been annoying. Actually dying would have been… a victory I suppose." Proving that he was someone. Not something. "Loss of identity is far worse." Feeling himself sink into the imposter’s self, fighting for purchase, for something to cling to.

He doesn’t realize that he is shivering until Eiji tightens his grip and he stops.

"I’m sorry." Eiji whispers softly, turning off the water since the heat is fading. "I didn’t mean to upset you." He kisses Ankh’s cheek again which earns him an annoyed huff.

"I am not upset." Because he is not afraid. Has nothing to be afraid of anymore. He is here and he is himself. Ankh is sure of that at least.

"You’re crying…" Eiji is frowning, all soft focus now, all his attention on Ankh. It is something to bask in, and Ankh wishes he could do that, but there is a statement made which is wrong and needs to be amended.

"I’m not crying." Ankh rolls his eyes when Eiji kisses his cheek again.

"You taste like salt."

Ankh reaches up and touches his own face. Wet cheeks, but they are in a shower. They don’t mean anything. Why should his eyes burn anyway?

"Come, let’s get dry." Warm hands. Eiji’s hands, sure of themselves now like they always were when taking care of someone. Not that he needed to be taken care of. Not that he minded it. It would have been stupid to mind attention.

Maybe once. When he had still been fighting the unfamiliarity of affection. When had things changed? As Eiji towels off them both, Ankh thinks back, tries to pinpoint the exact moment.

The purple medals. That must have been it. Those things which held a wrongness he had never been able to properly express to Eiji because the human lacked the means to sense their void. Or maybe the void inside Eiji had been too similar, had called out so loudly that they flew to him despite everybody’s wishes. Dr Maki wanted them back. Ankh wanted them out. And Eiji… could not let go at first, then he would not. They were gone now, but…

"What are you thinking about?" Eiji’s voice, carefully soft, just for the two of them, the bathroom leaking steam out into the small hotel room. He had a towel around his waist now, his body much like Ankh remembered it. It had been etched into his memories, too many nights of being half asleep in his nest, watching the human undress for bed.

"Did I save you?" Ankh doesn’t realize the words are out until they are spoken, drawn out of him like so many little gestures he never intended, spurred by the urge to fill the void inside the man.

"What do you mean?" Eiji pulled him over to the bed and sat him down, toweling his hair dry with comfortably familiar movements though he had never done this before.

What did he mean? Ankh hesitates a moment, melts back into the fingers massaging his scalp. He could have dried himself with a change and a shake, he might still have to do it later when he wants his hair to behave like he wants to. But for now this is a comfort, the sheets are cool against his scalded skin, Eiji a warm presence behind him.

"The purple medals…" Explaining himself is not something Ankh is used to, but he has come to realize that sometimes he needs to if he is to get the answers he wants. Find the right query for the search box, but smartphones were easier than people. Easier than Eiji.

"They’re gone." The pause had been too long, and Eiji had stepped in to fill it. "When the… future you I suppose, long story, gave me some medals back, they weren’t among them."

"I wanted…" Ankh hesitates again, his armored hand flickering back on, curling in annoyance. "They were wrong. I wanted to save you. They shouldn’t have you." Insufficient words for feelings that had confused him at the time.

He had tried to get them out. Had tried trickery and force. Had risked his own existence to snap Eiji out of his rampage though… yes. He had been scared then as well, hadn’t he? Scared of the axe. Scared of the nothingness in front of him. The corrosion so barely held in check. His armor smoking from mere contact, matching Eiji’s strength, forcing a moment’s hesitation so he could force the man to change back.

"Ankh…" The words are accompanied by a kiss to his shoulder, and Eiji’s tanned limbs wrapping around him from behind in an embrace. "They’re gone. You did save me. You…"

"Bullshit!" The anger comes from nowhere but is sharp and hard and bright and just what Ankh needs. He tears himself out of the embrace that threatens to break him in ways he doesn’t understand, eyes burning again. Anger is far more familiar. "If they are gone why is there still a hole?"

"Hole?" The look on Eiji’s face is one of confusion and a bit of guilt as he presses a hand against his chest. "Ankh, I…"

"Don’t give me that look!" Ankh hates that look because it hurts. Because it hits him where he has no armor. Has no defense other than attack. "I saw it. You are doing it again, pretending. Lying. Just like back then. Saying one thing but wanting something else. Wanting to be gone."

"No." Eiji is on his feet now as well, eyes hardening in determination. "I don’t want disappear. Not anymore. Not like that." He steps close, and Ankh can’t step back, the wall is cool behind him. "I promise. It’s just…"

"It’s just what?" Ankh holds on to the anger, matching Eiji’s stare. How often had they stood like this? As strangers at first. As rivals. As allies. As enemies. As partners. As friends. And now? As lovers? The stares remained the same. Opposing forces, and Ankh loves the way that there is a limit to how far Eiji can be pushed.

"It’s part of who I am." Eiji is as always the one that calms down first, doesn’t budge but turns reasonable. "As a human. As a person. I can’t just erase what happened in the past. I can just let it heal."

"Heal…" Eiji has no shirt to take hold of, so instead Ankh places his hands on the man’s shoulders which somehow make the gesture softer and more personal. "But you are doing that? Healing?" Healing he could understand. Being broken he could understand. The thought that the hole inside the man in front of him might get filled in time was… yes, it was a good thought. A good feeling.

"I am." Eiji is smiling now, a real smile, the one that hid nothing of the heart behind it. "I really am. You did save me. I couldn’t give them up before. Not until…" The way he paused and sucked in a deep breath might mean so many things, but he continued before Ankh could decide exactly what. "When you gave me your cracked core medal." He swallowed hard, blinking his eyes. "I could use them then. Use them for what they wanted. Destroy something. Without them destroying me. I wasn’t…"

"You were still prepared to die," Ankh pointed out, but softer.

"So were you." Eiji says it with a smile despite the shine in his eyes. "You really were. To save everyone."

"To save you," Ankh clarified, feeling the frown growing as he tried to navigate the conflicting feelings on Eiji’s face. "And her," he admitted after a moment’s hesitation.

"That’s good enough." Eiji nods vigorously and reaches up to cup Ankh’s chin in his hands. "We’re here. We’re alive. The world is safe. That’s good enough, right?"

"I suppose it has to be." There was a brittleness there that Ankh could smell, but choose to not comment on.

For now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was supposed to be smut, but the boys ran away with me. I suppose I have to make up for it in the next story.


End file.
